The Mom Test, by Rob Fitzpatrick
No more sugarcoated feedback — learn to dig deeper and get real answers from your customers.
Rob Fitzpatrick proposes The Mom Test, which is a framework that allows you to to understand your customers' problems and source actionable feedback, instead of being treated to empty and useless compliments. The tenets are:
Talk about their life instead of your idea
Ask about specifics in the past instead of generics or opinions about the future
Talk less and listen more
This is one of the absolute best tactical book on customer interviewing that I’ve come across.
The customer owns the problem; you own the solution
The core axiom of product design is that the customer owns the problem, while you own the solution.
"When you hear a request, it’s your job to understand the motivations which led to it. You do that by digging around the question to find the root cause. Why do they bother doing it this way? Why do they want the feature? How are they currently coping without the feature? Dig. You should dig in the same way around emotional signals to understand where they’re coming from. Just like feature requests, any strong emotion is worth exploring. Is someone angry? Dig. Embarrassed? Dig. Overjoyed? Dig!
I once overheard a founder interviewing someone at a cafe table next to me. The founder mentioned a problem and the guy responded, “Yeah, that’s pretty much the worst part of my day.” The founder jotted something down in his notebook, and then moved on to the next question. What!? It’s the worst part of his day and you’re not going to figure out why? That’s insane. You’ve got to dig.
Questions to dig into feature requests:
“Why do you want that?”
“What would that let you do?”
“How are you coping without it?”
“Do you think we should push back the launch add that feature, or is it something we could add later?”
“How would that fit into your day?”
Questions to dig into emotional signals:
“Tell me more about that.”
“That seems to really bug you — I bet there’s a story here.”
“What makes it so awful?”
“Why haven’t you been able to fix this already?”
“You seem pretty excited about that — it’s a big deal?”
“Why so happy?”
“Go on.”
These nudges don’t need to be complicated. People love talking about their opinions and emotions. Digging into a signal is basically just giving them permission to do a brain dump.
Rule of thumb: Ideas and feature requests should be understood, but not obeyed." (39)
Compliments are fool’s gold
We also know that compliments are fool's gold in customer learning (shiny, distracting, and entirely worthless), because people are averse to giving tough feedback that actually helps us grow (because it's hard to do that).
Fitzpatrick points out that we react so reflexively to compliments that it's often easier to spot the symptoms rather than the original compliment:
Symptoms (in the meeting):
“Thanks!”
“I’m glad you like it.”
Symptoms (back at the office):
“That meeting went really well.”
“We’re getting a lot of positive feedback.”
“Everybody I’ve talked to loves the idea.”
Therefore, Fitzpatrick advises that we should be extremely specific to counter these general compliments:
"Why did that person like the idea? How much money would it save him? How would it fit into his life? What else has he tried which failed to solve his problem? If you don’t know, then you’ve got a compliment instead of real data."
When you are trying to build a business, index on things that people are willing to part with that demonstrate skin in the game, rather than potentially empty words.
money: asking for a letter of intent or deposit
time: setting up a specific time in their calendar for the next call
social capital: asking them to introduce you to connections who have the same problem
Ask questions that invalidate your business
In the context of a startup, Rob Fitzpatrick points out that important questions are those that have the ability to completely change (or disprove) your business:
"If you get an unexpected answer to a question and it doesn’t affect what you’re doing, it wasn’t a terribly important question. Every time you talk to someone, you should be asking a question which has the potential to completely destroy your currently imagined business."
Pre-plan the important questions that you have.
“Always pre-plan the 3 most important things you want to learn from any given type of person. Pre-planning your big questions makes it a lot easier to ask questions which pass The Mom Test and aren’t biasing. It also makes it easier to face the questions that hurt. If we go through an unplanned conversation, we tend to focus on trivial stuff which keeps the conversation comfortable. Instead, decide what to ask with your team in a calm environment. Your 3 questions will be different for each type of person you’re talking to. If you have multiple types of customers or partners, have a list for each. Don’t stress too much about choosing the “right” important questions. They will change. Just choose the 3 questions which seem murkiest or most important right now. Doing so will give you firmer footing and a better sense of direction for your next 3.” (60)
And if you don’t know your most important question, perhaps you shouldn’t be having the meeting:
“If you don’t know what you’re trying to learn, you shouldn’t bother having the conversation." (109)
Talk less
The fundamental rule of customer interviewing is to talk less. Ultimately, you want to have a view into their world and their problems, and that is impossible if you're the one doing the talking. You want to maximize information gain.
"After you introduce your idea (either intentionally or accidentally), they’re going to begin a sentence with something like “So it’s similar to…” or “I like it but…” It’s tempting to interrupt and “fix” their understanding about how it’s totally different and actually does do that thing they want. Alternately, they’ll raise a topic you have a really good answer to. For example, they’ll mention how important security is, and you’ll want to cut in and tell them you’ve thought about all that already. This is also a mistake. In both cases, the listener was about to give you a privileged glimpse into their mental model of the world. Losing that learning is a shame." (43)
Ask good questions
"Do you think it's a good idea?"
Awful question! Here’s the thing: only the market can tell if your idea is good. Everything else is just opinion. Unless you’re talking to a deep industry expert, this is self-indulgent noise with a high risk of false positives. Let’s fix it: Say you’re building an app to help construction companies manage their suppliers. You might ask them to show you how they currently do it. Talk about which parts they love and hate. Ask which other tools and processes they tried before settling on this one. Are they actively searching for a replacement? If so, what’s the sticking point? If not, why not? Where are they losing money with their current tools? Is there a budget for better ones? Now, take all that information and decide for yourself whether it’s a good idea. Rule of thumb: Opinions are worthless.
"Would you buy a product which did X?"
Bad question. You’re asking for opinions and hypotheticals from overly optimistic people who want to make you happy. The answer to a question like this is almost always “yes”, which makes it worthless. Let’s fix it: Ask how they currently solve X and how much it costs them to do so. And how much time it takes. Ask them to talk you through what happened the last time X came up. If they haven’t solved the problem, ask why not. Have they tried searching for solutions and found them wanting? Or do they not even care enough to have Googled for it? Rule of thumb: Anything involving the future is an over-optimistic lie.
"How much would you pay for X?"
Bad question. This is exactly as bad as the last one, except it’s more likely to trick you because the number makes it feel rigorous and truthy. How to fix it: Just like the others, fix it by asking about their life as it already is. How much does the problem cost them? How much do they currently pay to solve it? How big is the budget they’ve allocated? I hope you’re noticing a trend here. Rule of thumb: People will lie to you if they think it’s what you want to hear.
"What would your dream product do?"
Sort-of-okay question, but only if you ask good follow-ups. Otherwise it’s a bad question. A question like this is like the “set” before the spike in a volleyball game: not too helpful on its own, but it puts you in a good position as long as you’re ready to exploit it. Let’s improve it: The value comes from understanding why they want these features. You don’t want to just collect feature requests. You aren’t building the product by committee. But the motivations and constraints behind those requests are critical. Rule of thumb: People know what their problems are, but they don’t know how to solve those problems.
"Why do you bother?"
Good question. I love this sort of question. It’s great for getting from the perceived problem to the real one. For example, some founders I knew were talking to finance guys spending hours each day sending emails about their spreadsheets. The finance guys were asking for better messaging tools so they could save time. The “why do you bother” question led to “so we can be certain that we’re all working off the latest version.” Aha. The solution ended up being less like the requested messaging tool and more like Dropbox. A question like “why do you bother” points toward their motivations. It gives you the why. Rule of thumb: You're shooting blind until you understand their goals.
"What are the implications of that?"
Good question. This distinguishes between I-will-pay-to-solve-that problems and thats-kind-of-annoying-but-I-can-deal-with-it “problems”. Some problems have big, costly implications. Others exist but don’t actually matter. It behooves you to find out which is which. It also gives you a good pricing signal. I once had someone keep describing the workflow we were fixing with emotionally loaded terms like “DISASTER”, accompanied by much yelling and arm waving. But when I asked him what the implications were, he sort of shrugged and said “Oh, we just ended up throwing a bunch of interns at the problem—it’s actually working pretty well.” Rule of thumb: Some problems don’t actually matter.
"Talk me through the last time that happened."
Good question. Your high school writing teacher may have told you that good stories are meant to “show, not tell”. Whenever possible, you want to be shown, not told by your customers. Learn through their actions instead of their opinions. If you ran a burger joint, it would be stupid to survey your customers about whether they prefer cheeseburgers or hamburgers. Just watch what they buy (but if you’re trying to understand why they prefer one over the other, you’ll have to talk to them). Folks can’t be wishy-washy when you’re watching them do the task in question. Get as close to the real action as you can. Seeing it first hand can provide unique insight into murky situations. But if you can’t get in there, asking them to talk you through the last time it happened still offers many of the benefits. Being walked through their full workflow answers many questions in one fell swoop: how do they spend their days, what tools do they use, and who do they talk to? What are the constraints of their day and life? How does your product fit into that day? Which other tools, products, software, and tasks does your product need to integrate with? Rule of thumb: Watching someone do a task will show you where the problems and inefficiencies really are, not where the customer thinks they are.
"What else have you tried?"
Good question. What are they using now? How much does it cost and what do they love and hate about it? How much would those fixes be worth and how big of a pain would it be for them to switch to a new solution? I was checking out an idea with a potential customer and they excitedly said, “Oh man, that happens all the time. I would definitely pay for something which solved that problem.” That’s a future-promise statement without any commitment to back it up, so I needed to learn whether it was true or not. I asked, “When’s the last time this came up?” Turns out, it was pretty recent. That’s a great sign. To dig further, I asked, “Can you talk me through how you tried to fix it?” He looked at me blankly, so I nudged him further. “Did you google around for any other ways to solve it?” He seemed a little bit like he’d been caught stealing from the cookie jar and said, “No… I didn’t really think to. It’s something I’m used to dealing with, you know?” In the abstract, it’s something he would “definitely” pay to solve. Once we got specific, he didn't even care enough to search for a solution (which do exist, incidentally). It’s easy to get someone emotional about a problem if you lead them there. “Don’t you hate when your shoelaces come untied while you’re carrying groceries?” “Yeah, that’s the worst!” And then I go off and design my special never-come-untied laces without realising that if you actually cared, you would already be using a double-knot. Rule of thumb: If they haven't looked for ways of solving it already, they're not going to look for (or buy) yours.
"Would you pay X for a product which did Y?"
Bad question. The fact that you’ve added a number doesn’t help. This is bad for the same reasons as the others: people are overly optimistic about what they would do and want to make you happy. Plus, it’s about your idea instead of their life. Let’s fix it: As always, ask about what they currently do now, not what they believe they might do in the future. Common wisdom is that you price your product in terms of value to the customer rather than cost to you. That's true. And you can't quantify the value received without prodding their financial worldview. Another way to fix it, if you’re far enough along, is to literally ask for money. If you have the deposit or pre-order in hand, you know they were telling the truth.
"How are you dealing with it now?"
Good question. Beyond workflow information, this gives you a price anchor. If they’re paying £100/month for a duct-tape workaround, you know which ballpark you're playing in. On the other hand, they may have spent £120,000 this year on agency fees to maintain a site you're replacing. If that's the case, you don't want to be having the £100 conversation. Sometimes, both of the above will be happening simultaneously and you get to choose how you present yourself. Do you want to be a replacement for the web app at a yearly value of £1.2k or for the agency at 100x that? Rule of thumb: While it’s rare for someone to tell you precisely what they’ll pay you, they’ll often show you what it’s worth to them.
"Where does the money come from?"
Good question. This isn't something you would necessarily ask a consumer (though you might), but in a B2B context it’s a must-ask. It leads to a conversation about whose budget the purchase will come from and who else within their company holds the power to torpedo the deal. Often, you'll find yourself talking to someone other than the budget owner. Your future pitches will hit unseen snags unless you learn who else matters and what they care about. This knowledge of their purchasing process will eventually turn into a repeatable sales roadmap.
"Who else should I talk to?"
Good question. Yes! End every conversation like this. Lining up the first few conversations can be challenging, but if you’re onto something interesting and treating people well, your leads will quickly multiply via intros. If someone doesn’t want to make intros, that’s cool too. Just leave them be. You’ve learned that you’re either screwing up the meeting (probably by being too formal, pitchy, or clingy) or they don’t actually care about the problem you’re solving. Take anything nice they say with an extra grain of salt.
"Is there anything else I should have asked?"
Good question. Usually, by the end of the meeting, people understand what you’re trying to do. Since you don’t know the industry, they’ll often be sitting there quietly while you completely miss the most important point. Asking this question gives them a chance to politely “fix” your line of questioning. And they will! This question is a bit of a crutch: you’ll discard it as you get better at asking good questions and as you get to know the industry. Rule of thumb: People want to help you, but will rarely do so unless you give them an excuse to do so.
Prioritize commitment and advancement through the sales process
In sales, moving a sales relationship to the next stage is called "advancement." A customer will either move forward or make it clear that they're not a customer. However, as Fitzpatrick points out, the worst thing is when you fail to push for advancement: you get zombie leads which waste your time.
Commitment is when the customer shows they are serious by giving up something they value like:
time (scheduling the next meeting)
reputation (facilitating introductions)
money
Fitzpatrick says meetings either succeed or fail. A meeting has succeeded when it ends with a commitment to advance to the next step, which is something that you need to make sure to push. Rejection is certainly not a failure, but the failure is not asking.
"A lost meeting can often be saved by just pushing for a commitment at the end while you're being brushed off with a compliment. But don't be annoying. You aren't trying to strong-arm folks into handing over their wallet. You are trying to cut through some of the polite rejections and find out if they're actually going to become a partner/investor/customer. If they aren't excited, then good news: you got the information you came for. Assimilate it, decide if it matters enough to change your strategy, and then keep on keeping on. The goal is just to put them to a decision so you can learn whether you've found a must-have product and a real customer. Rule of thumb: It’s not a real lead until you’ve given them a concrete chance to reject you." (77)
Lukewarm customer responses are extremely valuable, because they give you a clear signal that people don't care.
"The worst thing you can do is ignore the bad news while searching for some tiny grain of validation to celebrate. You want the truth, not a gold star. Some of the most informative (and thus best) responses you can get are along the lines of, “Umm, I’m not so sure about that” and "That's pretty neat." Both are lukewarm responses which tell you they don’t care. In this context, “best” means learning, not selling. If you’re a sales guy going door to door selling gadgets and someone doesn’t care, then that is a bad result: you’re not getting paid. But if you’re trying to decide whether to invest your time and money in developing, building and promoting that gadget, then lukewarm is a terrific response. It gives you a crystal clear signal that this person does not care. It’s perfectly reliable information you can take to the bank. The classic error in response to a lukewarm signal is to “up your game” and pitch them until they say something nice. Unless they’re holding a check, the only thing to gain from “convincing” them are false positives. You’re not here to collect compliments; you’re trying to learn the truth. Their lukewarm response already gave you that. If they’re still engaged in the conversation, it’s worth asking a couple follow-up questions to understand the nature of their apathy. Is the “problem” not actually that big of a deal? Are they fundamentally different from your ideal customers? Do they not care about the specific implementation? Are they worn out and skeptical from hearing too many pitches, like cafe owners in the aftermath of Groupon? Are they just plain tired today? After that, say a big thanks and leave them to their day. They’ve probably helped you more than the guy who said he loved it. Rule of thumb: There’s more reliable information in a “meh” than a “Wow!” You can’t build a business on a lukewarm response." (46)
Choose customers that you care about and you can reach
Rob Fitzpatrick talks about how when building a business you should choose customers that you care about and you can reach.
Product-channel fit: you have to be able to reach these customers. First of all, you need to be able to reach them to sell to them, but you also want to be able to reach them quickly so that you can maximize your iteration speed.
You also need to care about these people. Building something is a fundamentally tiring and arduous process that requires long-term thinking.
In the same way that you want to play long-term games with long-term people in those people that you directly work with for a company, you will be ostensibly working with your customers for the rest of your career — so you better like them!